Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
