I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
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