my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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