piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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