dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
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