Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
