theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
