Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
