Say something about gay babies.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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