So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Best friends brother. Beat that.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize