Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
