C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
