You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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