i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
