Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
