Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
