why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
