google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
