I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
