I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
