I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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