what day is it and did you see me today?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
