so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
