you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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