I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
