i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
