We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
