If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
