I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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