you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
