How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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