I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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