Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
