Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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