Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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