Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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