Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
