meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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