So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
