There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize