I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Just invented taco cereal.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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