Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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