I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
