Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
He kissed a someone with a penis
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
