I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
