She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Randomize
