the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
