): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Randomize
