would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
