So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
