That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
